Re: Masturbation Achievements

I should go dig up the image I had on /ss/ that crossed out everything I did

Re: Masturbation Achievements

This thread might be why our female users leave. Has Aya seen this?

a.

Re: Masturbation Achievements

They leave because they're cunts.

There are no clear way to learn it unlike html and css who are actually funny to learn and explore.

Quotes:

sloth wrote:

Hold your head down and you won't get hurt. You'll get exploited, abused and spit on, but hey at least you're safe. Fuck that. I have one life to live, and I'll live it my fucking way. Go on. Stand in my way. See what happens. See what happens when a good guy snaps.

sloth wrote:

There are cemetery for living people. They are called "cubicles". And "assembly line". And "McDonalds". And any other full of shit job you can think about. It's where you are dying every day so you can live on a few select days of your life. If you're not to powered out from working.

loon_attic wrote:

everything is shit and people love it because they're hipster masochists or something

absentinsomniac wrote:

she said to eat her out w/ an ice curbe but nah goodnight lol

Re: Masturbation Achievements

Hm. Women are cunts. How long did it take you faggot to aquire this truth?

Hindsight is always 20/20.

God wrote:

A surprising amount of insight can be gleamed from sitting on the toilet. More concerning, however, is the amount of nostalgia. neutral



When in doubt, move north. God bless suomi.

Re: Masturbation Achievements

http://img195.imageshack.us/img195/8357/lolfaped.png

The sad thing is, I can add more now. I'm just too lazy to edit it.

31 (edited by Princess-Retard 2016-05-10 13:53:34)

Re: Masturbation Achievements

Games achievements are cancers, made for normies with insecurity issues and asian-sized dicks.
But I tried hard to get those because it was challenging.

https://i.gyazo.com/8b40ea2aa17919e4881f993413bba7f9.png

sloth wrote:

Hm. Women are cunts. How long did it take you faggot to aquire this truth?

They leave because they're cunts.

Being misogynistic bastards isn't edgy. It's a failed normie thing, try something else, Elliot Rodger fellows.

BRUTAL EDIT OMONA ITS NOT A THREAD ABOUT GAME ACHIEVEMENT AT ALL. Makes sense, now.
Yes, I'm not the smartest cookie in the jar but you better cool it, I don't brag about touching myself on the Internets.

Re: Masturbation Achievements

muh soggy knees

"Humanity Is Overrated" - Shrek

Re: Masturbation Achievements

I am the masturbation champion. No one has masterbated like I have. I have masturbated in space, in alternate dimensions. Do not try to put me down with your puny assumptions, for I have truly transcended the mortal limits of getting my nut.

Re: Masturbation Achievements

why not, wow you're so like superior for not bragging about touching yourself on the internets
nop

sloth wrote:

Comfy does not provide challenge, challenge provides success, success provides happiness. Our world is not comfy, although we tried to make it so. Slaves of our own inventions, yada, yada. Not only on a technological level, also on a social and political level. Nothing more but apes. Apes with psychosomatic disorders.

Re: Masturbation Achievements

absentinsomniac wrote:

I am the masturbation champion. No one has masterbated like I have. I have masturbated in space, in alternate dimensions. Do not try to put me down with your puny assumptions, for I have truly transcended the mortal limits of getting my nut.

I masturbated across the multiverse. My seeds are so epic on the quantum level that they're in superposition so don't even dare trying to measure it cause it'll collapse the wave function.

"Creepy crazy fucking idiot Nr. 873894532"-aCol

Wes wrote:


^^ funny
this guy
the most well written and verbose shitposter on the internet

Re: Masturbation Achievements

anal masturbation is lyfe. Like it feels like your balls are fucking empty afterwards it's that nice. And really you just do the anal shit with fingers or dildo or whatever (it's not even gay really unless you use a dildo that is a realistic dick replica) then when you've gone pretty hard in there you start to jerk off and fuck yourself at the same time and it's a fucking eruption of pleasure. Like whenever I do that I basically start saying "fuck" and stuff like that and moaning a bit even if people can hear since it's that fucking nice and I can't control it hahaha

There are no clear way to learn it unlike html and css who are actually funny to learn and explore.

Quotes:

sloth wrote:

Hold your head down and you won't get hurt. You'll get exploited, abused and spit on, but hey at least you're safe. Fuck that. I have one life to live, and I'll live it my fucking way. Go on. Stand in my way. See what happens. See what happens when a good guy snaps.

sloth wrote:

There are cemetery for living people. They are called "cubicles". And "assembly line". And "McDonalds". And any other full of shit job you can think about. It's where you are dying every day so you can live on a few select days of your life. If you're not to powered out from working.

loon_attic wrote:

everything is shit and people love it because they're hipster masochists or something

absentinsomniac wrote:

she said to eat her out w/ an ice curbe but nah goodnight lol

Re: Masturbation Achievements

gotta love that prostate play

Re: Masturbation Achievements

Fish20 wrote:

anal masturbation is lyfe. Like it feels like your balls are fucking empty afterwards it's that nice. And really you just do the anal shit with fingers or dildo or whatever (it's not even gay really unless you use a dildo that is a realistic dick replica) then when you've gone pretty hard in there you start to jerk off and fuck yourself at the same time and it's a fucking eruption of pleasure. Like whenever I do that I basically start saying "fuck" and stuff like that and moaning a bit even if people can hear since it's that fucking nice and I can't control it hahaha

Plz up the butt is not geyh. Gay is only if u like guys romantically and shit. Otherwise it's just hedonism.

"Creepy crazy fucking idiot Nr. 873894532"-aCol

Wes wrote:


^^ funny
this guy
the most well written and verbose shitposter on the internet

Re: Masturbation Achievements

I actually don't find much wrong with hedonism and don't get why people think it's such a bad thing.


Except I guess when it fucks up other peoples business, but ime at least like 3/4ths of the time it doesn't.

Re: Masturbation Achievements

i'm scared of sticking my finger up my ass, i feel like it'll just hurt a lot

sloth wrote:

Comfy does not provide challenge, challenge provides success, success provides happiness. Our world is not comfy, although we tried to make it so. Slaves of our own inventions, yada, yada. Not only on a technological level, also on a social and political level. Nothing more but apes. Apes with psychosomatic disorders.

Re: Masturbation Achievements

Pussy.

Re: Masturbation Achievements

loon_attic wrote:

i'm scared of sticking my finger up my ass, i feel like it'll just hurt a lot

at first it does cause it's tight but if you use lots of lube (or spit) it's fine also make sure you didn't just take a shit or haven't shit in a while or it gets gross. if you go in dry with anything it will hurt. the first time I had to kinda massage it sort of to get it to be relaxed and open up. take a shower first too you dingo

There are no clear way to learn it unlike html and css who are actually funny to learn and explore.

Quotes:

sloth wrote:

Hold your head down and you won't get hurt. You'll get exploited, abused and spit on, but hey at least you're safe. Fuck that. I have one life to live, and I'll live it my fucking way. Go on. Stand in my way. See what happens. See what happens when a good guy snaps.

sloth wrote:

There are cemetery for living people. They are called "cubicles". And "assembly line". And "McDonalds". And any other full of shit job you can think about. It's where you are dying every day so you can live on a few select days of your life. If you're not to powered out from working.

loon_attic wrote:

everything is shit and people love it because they're hipster masochists or something

absentinsomniac wrote:

she said to eat her out w/ an ice curbe but nah goodnight lol

Re: Masturbation Achievements

Hear it from the expert above.



For unknown reasons, I can tell you a prostate orgasm is weird, but awesome. Don't ask from where I have this information.

Hindsight is always 20/20.

God wrote:

A surprising amount of insight can be gleamed from sitting on the toilet. More concerning, however, is the amount of nostalgia. neutral



When in doubt, move north. God bless suomi.

Re: Masturbation Achievements

Princess-Retard wrote:

Pussy.

Only you'd know.

"There's no 'I' in 'Team'". Yeah, but there is a "Me" in "Team" spelled backwards!

Re: Masturbation Achievements

batboy138 wrote:
Princess-Retard wrote:

Pussy.

Only you'd know.

sloth wrote:

Comfy does not provide challenge, challenge provides success, success provides happiness. Our world is not comfy, although we tried to make it so. Slaves of our own inventions, yada, yada. Not only on a technological level, also on a social and political level. Nothing more but apes. Apes with psychosomatic disorders.

Re: Masturbation Achievements

sloth wrote:

For unknown reasons, I can tell you a prostate orgasm is weird, but awesome. Don't ask from where I have this information.

http://s2.quickmeme.com/img/2c/2c917e79a0e4fa5bfd5d3a35fc7d3eb80a93d754b9d1946b1a4a0a5b0b368f8c.jpg

There are no clear way to learn it unlike html and css who are actually funny to learn and explore.

Quotes:

sloth wrote:

Hold your head down and you won't get hurt. You'll get exploited, abused and spit on, but hey at least you're safe. Fuck that. I have one life to live, and I'll live it my fucking way. Go on. Stand in my way. See what happens. See what happens when a good guy snaps.

sloth wrote:

There are cemetery for living people. They are called "cubicles". And "assembly line". And "McDonalds". And any other full of shit job you can think about. It's where you are dying every day so you can live on a few select days of your life. If you're not to powered out from working.

loon_attic wrote:

everything is shit and people love it because they're hipster masochists or something

absentinsomniac wrote:

she said to eat her out w/ an ice curbe but nah goodnight lol

47

Re: Masturbation Achievements

10 seconds

am i doing this achievement thing rite??244