Re: Absent's Party / Socializing Advice.

Probably somewhere between 20 - 40% I'd guess. Statistics are all over the place.

Re: Absent's Party / Socializing Advice.

https://i.giphy.com/media/3oriNKlMNxpkmmgNaM/giphy.gif

There are no clear way to learn it unlike html and css who are actually funny to learn and explore.

Quotes:

sloth wrote:

Hold your head down and you won't get hurt. You'll get exploited, abused and spit on, but hey at least you're safe. Fuck that. I have one life to live, and I'll live it my fucking way. Go on. Stand in my way. See what happens. See what happens when a good guy snaps.

sloth wrote:

There are cemetery for living people. They are called "cubicles". And "assembly line". And "McDonalds". And any other full of shit job you can think about. It's where you are dying every day so you can live on a few select days of your life. If you're not to powered out from working.

loon_attic wrote:

everything is shit and people love it because they're hipster masochists or something

absentinsomniac wrote:

she said to eat her out w/ an ice curbe but nah goodnight lol

Re: Absent's Party / Socializing Advice.

Be willing to change, if you want something different you have to do something different. Accept responsibility, what you do now will determine what happens in the near, and long term future. You are responsible for creating your own future. Find ideas to try that might get you one step closer to the ideal / better life you want, follow those threads. You don't know all the steps ahead of time, you find new steps as you get to them. Stay the course. Commit to change. If you turn around half way there, you end up back where you started. Be wary of limiting beliefs, and know that progress isn't linear. It won't always feel like you're making progress and you won't always feel likd you're moving. Keep at it.


You don't have to arrive to feel better, you just have to be moving in the right direction.

Re: Absent's Party / Socializing Advice.

Existence could be beautiful, or it could be ugly. But that's on you.

Re: Absent's Party / Socializing Advice.

When you carry around a suspicion that there’s something sort of embarrassing or pathetic about you, you find ways to project that shame onto completely innocuous things. You find ways to tell yourself that everyone is laughing at you behind your back somewhere, possibly at a party where they are serving beautiful tasty drinks but you weren’t invited. You’re too old now. You’re no longer exciting or important. You don’t matter. You never really did.

Shame creates imaginary worlds inside your head. This haunted house you’re creating is forged from your shame. No one else can see it, so you keep trying to describe it to them. You find ways to say, “You don’t want any part of this mess. I’m mediocre, aging rapidly, and poor. Do yourself a favor and leave me behind.” You want to be left behind, though. That way, no one bears witness to what you’ve become.

https://www.thecut.com/2018/11/im-broke … V9Mw-of214


It’s okay to be in debt and worried. It’s okay to feel lonely and lost. It’s okay to feel tired of trying. It’s okay to want more and wonder how to get it. You’re just a human, this is how we feel a lot. It’s not irregular or aberrant to feel despair. This is part of survival. Your shame is forming your despair into a merciless story about your worth. Don’t let it do that. Build something else from your shame instead.

Re: Absent's Party / Socializing Advice.

"People will sometimes choose an incompetent mate because they're intimidated by competence, so they'll settle for someone they don't respect because they feel they can master them and they won't be intimiated. But it's not a recipe for a happy life, I can tell you that."


oof

132

Re: Absent's Party / Socializing Advice.

Big oof.

Hindsight is always 20/20.

God wrote:

A surprising amount of insight can be gleamed from sitting on the toilet. More concerning, however, is the amount of nostalgia. neutral



When in doubt, move north. God bless suomi.

133

Re: Absent's Party / Socializing Advice.

Whoa the OP is dope advice

Re: Absent's Party / Socializing Advice.

This was worth the 3 hours:


Re: Absent's Party / Socializing Advice.

the alex jones one is great jordan peterson is good sam harris is very good ben sharpio is very good

Re: Absent's Party / Socializing Advice.

zoh em gee it s liek another joe rogan peterson bro i bet ur sexist racist white boy haha white ppl r so toxic and evil omg

sloth wrote:

Comfy does not provide challenge, challenge provides success, success provides happiness. Our world is not comfy, although we tried to make it so. Slaves of our own inventions, yada, yada. Not only on a technological level, also on a social and political level. Nothing more but apes. Apes with psychosomatic disorders.

Re: Absent's Party / Socializing Advice.

Anytime you're not supposed to like something per some big group it's probably worth looking into for yourself lol. I don't even agree with everything any of these public people talk about but there's a lot of useful / good stuff from them. At minimum it provides another perspective. The video above gives a decent overview of a evolutionary take on why people act the way they do which is why it's in this thread.

Re: Absent's Party / Socializing Advice.

watch the rubin reports with Shapiro and Peterson together, very nice

There are no clear way to learn it unlike html and css who are actually funny to learn and explore.

Quotes:

sloth wrote:

Hold your head down and you won't get hurt. You'll get exploited, abused and spit on, but hey at least you're safe. Fuck that. I have one life to live, and I'll live it my fucking way. Go on. Stand in my way. See what happens. See what happens when a good guy snaps.

sloth wrote:

There are cemetery for living people. They are called "cubicles". And "assembly line". And "McDonalds". And any other full of shit job you can think about. It's where you are dying every day so you can live on a few select days of your life. If you're not to powered out from working.

loon_attic wrote:

everything is shit and people love it because they're hipster masochists or something

absentinsomniac wrote:

she said to eat her out w/ an ice curbe but nah goodnight lol

Re: Absent's Party / Socializing Advice.


If a girl looks at you like this she likes you. Most of the time it won't be that obvious. You should get good at eye contact, also.

Re: Absent's Party / Socializing Advice.

I've been tryna get better at that but i feel like my flat facial expressions throws people off xD

Re: Absent's Party / Socializing Advice.

ugh


that sounds borderline impossible to me wtf

Re: Absent's Party / Socializing Advice.

I'd rather feel not good enough so I have a reason to improve then feel okay with myself and stagnate.

There are no clear way to learn it unlike html and css who are actually funny to learn and explore.

Quotes:

sloth wrote:

Hold your head down and you won't get hurt. You'll get exploited, abused and spit on, but hey at least you're safe. Fuck that. I have one life to live, and I'll live it my fucking way. Go on. Stand in my way. See what happens. See what happens when a good guy snaps.

sloth wrote:

There are cemetery for living people. They are called "cubicles". And "assembly line". And "McDonalds". And any other full of shit job you can think about. It's where you are dying every day so you can live on a few select days of your life. If you're not to powered out from working.

loon_attic wrote:

everything is shit and people love it because they're hipster masochists or something

absentinsomniac wrote:

she said to eat her out w/ an ice curbe but nah goodnight lol

Re: Absent's Party / Socializing Advice.

What seemed more problematic to me was that he said you should get to a place where you're legitimately happy with your ex finding someone to be happy with, even right after breaking up. Like you're able to get to a place where you're happy when you see other people being happy. I get that and I agree, but I can't quite imagine myself being happy at the sight of my ex finding a man better suited to her. And maybe that's selfish, but the idea is you get so okay with who you are and you love yourself so much, you're overflowing, so you're happy that other people are doing great. I legitimately am happy for a lot of people when they are winning and succeeding, like my friends especially, but my ex? I want her to be happy I guess, she's a great person, but... I don't know if I could get to a place where I'm happy she's found someone.


It drives me up a wall thinking about her getting fucked by some other guy. My heart rate goes up thinking about it. Plus I haven't been able to get her the fuck out of my mind, except sometimes. I'm working out, eating a bit healthier, drinking less, meeting new people, moved to a new city, none of it matters. I still think about her. I turned off notifications from facebook, everything. I just don't know if I'll be able to get to that place. At least not until I fall in love with someone new. But by then it's kinda besides the point and I didn't organically get to that place, anyway.

144

Re: Absent's Party / Socializing Advice.

It's a hard thing to accept. I disagree though. People are allowed to feel hurt, vulnerable and unhappy. If you are in the place where you say "My ex just broke up with me, but I'm fine, she's doing better" you certainly are a virtuous person.
But, we aren't Buddha. We're human, and we get hurt. Physically and emotionally. What people tend to forget is that it is ok to feel hurt. That it is natural for a human being to want to smash in the head of the guy who is shagging your ex. To be disgusted at the thought.
As a (straight) human male, you are biologically programmed to reproduce. And therefor, you want that to happen with your sperm. When somebody else is with your ex, it isn't your sperm, and that is disappointing. From a biological point of view. I think we keep forgetting what we are (an intermediate species, but we won't talk about that now): human.

There's a lot of talk about how you should behave. How you should feel. Less talk about what you do feel, and why you feel it.

Hindsight is always 20/20.

God wrote:

A surprising amount of insight can be gleamed from sitting on the toilet. More concerning, however, is the amount of nostalgia. neutral



When in doubt, move north. God bless suomi.

Re: Absent's Party / Socializing Advice.

damn yeah, that seems spot on

Re: Absent's Party / Socializing Advice.

I'm probably going to take my friend to a bar but I'll probably just stand around so idefk what to do there. Like,talking to strangers is actually scary as fuck sometimes. Well, it's really hard because I'm not CONFIDENT and CAPABLE of conversation. What the fuck do you do, like you walk in, order a drink, and just stand there right? ugh it hurts to think about. but what are you supposed to do?

There are no clear way to learn it unlike html and css who are actually funny to learn and explore.

Quotes:

sloth wrote:

Hold your head down and you won't get hurt. You'll get exploited, abused and spit on, but hey at least you're safe. Fuck that. I have one life to live, and I'll live it my fucking way. Go on. Stand in my way. See what happens. See what happens when a good guy snaps.

sloth wrote:

There are cemetery for living people. They are called "cubicles". And "assembly line". And "McDonalds". And any other full of shit job you can think about. It's where you are dying every day so you can live on a few select days of your life. If you're not to powered out from working.

loon_attic wrote:

everything is shit and people love it because they're hipster masochists or something

absentinsomniac wrote:

she said to eat her out w/ an ice curbe but nah goodnight lol

Re: Absent's Party / Socializing Advice.

find a seat and chill, if it's so packed there's nowhere to sit it's pretty awkward unless you have a group of people to hang out with and even then it's a bit awkward


i always try to find somewhere to sit down and stare at girls and chat


when I go to bars alone I just sit at the bar and hang out until someone eventually starts chatting me up, ordering drinks, maybe smalltalk with the bartender