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Be willing to change, if you want something different you have to do something different. Accept responsibility, what you do now will determine what happens in the near, and long term future. You are responsible for creating your own future. Find ideas to try that might get you one step closer to the ideal / better life you want, follow those threads. You don't know all the steps ahead of time, you find new steps as you get to them. Stay the course. Commit to change. If you turn around half way there, you end up back where you started. Be wary of limiting beliefs, and know that progress isn't linear. It won't always feel like you're making progress and you won't always feel likd you're moving. Keep at it.
You don't have to arrive to feel better, you just have to be moving in the right direction.
Ur an aesthetician, Harry.
When you carry around a suspicion that there’s something sort of embarrassing or pathetic about you, you find ways to project that shame onto completely innocuous things. You find ways to tell yourself that everyone is laughing at you behind your back somewhere, possibly at a party where they are serving beautiful tasty drinks but you weren’t invited. You’re too old now. You’re no longer exciting or important. You don’t matter. You never really did.
Shame creates imaginary worlds inside your head. This haunted house you’re creating is forged from your shame. No one else can see it, so you keep trying to describe it to them. You find ways to say, “You don’t want any part of this mess. I’m mediocre, aging rapidly, and poor. Do yourself a favor and leave me behind.” You want to be left behind, though. That way, no one bears witness to what you’ve become.
It’s okay to be in debt and worried. It’s okay to feel lonely and lost. It’s okay to feel tired of trying. It’s okay to want more and wonder how to get it. You’re just a human, this is how we feel a lot. It’s not irregular or aberrant to feel despair. This is part of survival. Your shame is forming your despair into a merciless story about your worth. Don’t let it do that. Build something else from your shame instead.
"People will sometimes choose an incompetent mate because they're intimidated by competence, so they'll settle for someone they don't respect because they feel they can master them and they won't be intimiated. But it's not a recipe for a happy life, I can tell you that."
When in doubt, move north. God bless suomi.
Whoa the OP is dope advice